I really don't mind aging, I mean except for the aches and pains and less and less mobility. I really don't like other things, though. I chose to be married at 20 and proceeded to have a family with 5 children. When things got tough I took in some childcare and sold crafts and lollipops. I gardened and crafted and tried not to put too much of a strain on our otherwise single income family. I served in many volunteer capacities with children and youth in the community and church. I didn't start working outside of the home until the youngest was in school, and I worked in the school system in order to not pay for childcare, and to be available for the kids and their activities, and to have the same vacations, breaks and holidays.
Fast forward, I mean speedy fast forward--now I'm retired from the school system, because being in the 7th decade of my life, I didn't feel capable mentally and physically to continue on. So, because I worked for many years in jobs that were 6 or 6 and a half hours a day and 185 school days a year, my retirement is not a sizable one.
I didn't plan to be a all by me onesies in my later years with a somewhat meager retirement. Because I chose to build a new house at age 68 or so, I also have a new mortgage, not that the old mortgage would be paid off in my lifetime, but, just because, maybe I had a dream. I built affordably. I could probably find a rental for under $1500 a month, a small studio apartment or something.
Because I didn't plan for retirement, I didn't look into more education for a higher paying job, because I didn't choose a career, well, to be honest, I chose a little bit of time and freedom to be available when people, family and friends needed help mostly for running errands, light yard work, cleaning up and helping to organize other households.
As the economy goes, it becomes harder and harder to make ends meet and aside from that, on the medical insurance side of things, I am possible living at the poverty level. Possibly. On less than $3000 a month.
BUT, because I chose Motherhood, and it took a village to raise those fine people, the village has come to my aid. The barn home is large enough to house more than myself. I have been able to house a family of 7 for a year while they built their house. They helped me tremendously in so many ways, not just in supplementing my income. I grew to love and adore each of them individually. I watched as the parents orchestrated a life at my place, making accommodations for 5 kids and organizing them to help with housekeeping and yard chores and homeschooling. I cannot help but feel the blessings I received from Heaven because of them. I am so grateful.
And now my grand daughter will live here for a few months while her husband is deployed to the Middle East. We expect the first great grandchild to be arriving in just a couple of weeks.
I welcome also to have another roomie as my daughter pulls things together as both her girls are treading life on their own. I'm hoping that she finds peace here as a pit stop to whatever else is in store for her future.
I'm navigating through retirement and looking closely at things I will need. Medicare and supplemental insurances are not enough. I have increased my debt due to macular degeneration and double cataract surgeries. I probably need to have medical care for other things like allergies, bad air quality and whatever else may be hampering my breathing. My voice is thready at times and there is a wretched coughing that ensues when I exert myself physically or consume spicy or crumbly foods. PITS!!
In spite of recent things, I would not change any of the choices I have made throughout the years. I find joy in every day. I know there will always be changes and research and opportunities to serve and to be served. I know that God Blesses my life exponentially and that everything will be okay...I have a few very good years of life ahead, and I'm thankful that I chose Motherhood.
